Wednesday, October 23, 2019

Is it weird to say, "I love you dad"?


Is it weird to say ,"I love you dad"?




This sign above shows us that even in the day and age we are in now kids still filed weird about telling their dad, "I love you". Some feel it’s weird because the “L” word is not something they say in their family, some keep from saying because they are pretty sure their dad won’t reciprocate and it will get awkward, still to others it just not something that one guy says to another even if they are related. Why have we not been able to move past emotions as not being masculine? How does letting someone know that you love, make you less of a man than when you say I hate you to someone? Both express an emotion. I have found that even when I talk to my dad I never know if when we hang up the phone if he is going to say “ I love you” or not and I certainly do not want to say it and have him just hang up. I love my dad and know that he loves me but neither of parents really say I love you very much. You would think with my dad having 3 girls “I love you” would come out more but it never did and still doesn’t.

What is interesting, is that I do notice that with my kids (2 boys and a girl) he says I love you more than he ever did than with my sisters and I. While my dad has not seemed to move forward much in his expression of love with his daughters, he has managed to grow to be more emotional with his grandkids. I see my dad working harder to change behaviors that he had with us growing up and moving and branching out to be a different type of masculine for the kids. Trust me he is still very much into the “don’t touch my eyebrows” when I go to the barber and “don’t you dare wear that”, type of guy but there are more “I love you’s” and more it’s ok to get upset with the grandkids. I love that I have seen a growth in my dad but wonder if our relationship will be able to evolve like it has with my kids?

The link below is to a great article from Metro UK about Father's Day and lack of I Love You's and the cliches of the past that are still present today.

https://metro.co.uk/2018/06/15/fathers-day-tell-us-toxic-masculinity-7633889/

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