Stories of a Stubborn Wonder Woman

I got into an argument with my mom the other day. We went to Walmart to buy a couple of things and I went to grab a 40 lbs. bag of dog food. Because we were only in there for a couple of things, I held the bag, I didn’t think it was a big deal.

My mom told my 15 year old brother to come over to me to help me, but me being the stubborn individual that I am, didn’t need help. I told him I got it and we joined my mom. My mom got frustrated that I wouldn’t let my brother hold the bag of dog food but the only reason she wanted him to do it was because he was a man. Literally the words that came out of her mouth.

At that point, it locked in my head that I was most definitely not going to let my brother hold the bag of dog food because of the really bad excuse my mom gave. We got into the car and got into a huge argument. She told me she raised me to not need a man, to use tools, to figure out problems on my own without help from anyone. I told her I was grateful for it, but if that’s how she raised me, then it shouldn’t have been an issue for me to hold the heavy bag of dog food.

She went on to tell me that since I had already learned, it was now her turn to teach my brother how to be a man. How to be respectful and to carry heavy things so a woman wouldn’t have to.

I understood where she was coming from but his lessons shouldn’t be taught at my expense. While she was trying to teach him a man, consistently telling him to tell me to give him the bag also teaches him that he constantly should ask for permission for something even though a firm ‘no’ has already been given.  

The conversation went unresolved. I appreciate her efforts in teaching my brother how to be a gentleman, but she should also be teaching him how to respect boundaries and if that means accepting no as an answer than that’s a heavy lesson to be taught and learned.