One thing I've noticed since becoming a mother is the unrelenting disparages between my duties as a mother and the duties of my daughter's father. He is a great father, does everything he should and more, always helps me when I need it, always volunteers for diaper changes, etc. But one thing I notice from friends, family, coworkers, etc. is that it's a lot more common for people to commend dads for duties that moms do with no recognition. When a dad is caught changing a diaper, or even the bare minimum of pushing a stroller or holding a diaper bag, it's as if society collectively "awwwww"s at how great of a dad he is, while moms alongside him get no acknowledgment for doing all the same things and more. The other day, my coworker literally asked me if my husband was "home babysitting". No, he's not babysitting. He's at home taking care of the child he is equally responsible for. I feel like this is intrinsically related to toxic masculinity, and how men being caring and dutiful to their children isn't as normalized as it is or women. That isn't a masculine trait, so when men step up to these roles, they are praised tenfold to their female counterparts. Not that I'm asking for a medal for wiping baby butts all day, but listening to this discourse is maddening.
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