a blog created for UCF Theories of Masculinitiy students to share experiences, resources/links, articles/reviews, to rouse discussion and incite action, and engage issues related to masculinity. you should participate, too. email moderator for permission at Leandra@ucf.edu.
Saturday, November 28, 2015
Male Ignorance is Bliss
So talking with many men and having just dealt with the males in my family during Thanksgiving I happened upon something quite interesting. Men are completely and totally unaware of a ton of things that they do or say to the women they are with. And they have NO idea how much they are hurting the women they are with or hurting their relationship with them. A prime example is that on the day of Thanksgiving my mom, aunt, and grandmother were all in the kitchen cooking. The men were off chatting in the living room and watching TV. I happened to be in the kitchen but not cooking; I was studying to take the GRE. A test kind of like the SAT or ACT but for grad school. My uncle walked into the kitchen to grab a snack (not to offer any kind of help - let's be honest) and saw that I was not helping cook. He asked why I wasn't helping the women cook and when I (and the other women cooking) responded that I was studying for a test he balked and said it couldn't be that important and I should do some real work. When I tried to explain why it was so important he blew me off completely and made a misogynistic comment. I have loved and admired my uncle since I was a child but over the years his comments and actions towards women (myself included) have made me loose respect for him and distance myself. We used to be close and every winter he would take me skiing. Now I never talk to him expect maybe once a year during family gatherings and he doesn't understand why. He misses our relationship from when I was a child. Maybe male ignorance isn't bliss after all.